


light my way at night

by moonatoms



Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: F/M, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-03
Updated: 2017-10-04
Packaged: 2019-01-08 18:52:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,541
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12260085
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moonatoms/pseuds/moonatoms
Summary: It wasn’t until she lifted her head that he could see she had been crying, her face puffy and swollen and blue eyes swimming with still unshed tears.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [titC](https://archiveofourown.org/users/titC/gifts), [BurningUpASunJustToSayHello](https://archiveofourown.org/users/BurningUpASunJustToSayHello/gifts).



> For titC who asked for the prompt "I need a place to stay" from [this](https://moonatoms.tumblr.com/post/166015476964/drabble-challenge) prompt meme.

_Now, this burden weighs me down_  
_The heaviest of weights_  
_Knocks me to the ground_

 

 

He had just poured himself a big glass of whiskey and sat down at his piano when the elevator door opened with a “ping”, signalling an end to his quiet, broody night.

 

He raised his head with a sigh at the sound. It had been a long couple of weeks. Maybe it was the weather, or the criminals could just sense that they were quickly reaching their limit, but between murders and more murders and kidnappings, they had barely caught a break in two months. So when they had finally shut their last case and the lieutenant ordered them to take a few days off, Chloe had quietly requested a night alone. Trixie was with Dan and all she wanted was a long soak in her bathtub and a glass of wine.

 

He’d been disappointed, to say the least. They had grown much closer over the past few months and these days they rarely spent a night apart. Sometimes they’d go to her place and eat take-out and watch old movies. Other days, when Trixie was with Dan or the slew of babysitters, both celestial and human, she had managed to acquire over the past year, Chloe would come over. They’d cook and he’d play her songs on the piano and there was always laughter and more open and honest conversations than he could ever recall having before. Sometimes she would fall asleep in his guest room and he’d wake her with coffee and eggs in the morning.

 

One topic they avoided, however, was talking about _them_ and what they were or could maybe become. Until today.

 

Sensing his disappointment, Chloe had quietly pulled him inside her apartment and told him that she _liked_ what they were becoming and that she in no way wanted to go back to what they had once been, but that she simply needed a night to herself.

 

Her words, the closest they had ever come to this particular conversation, had made it even harder for him to pull away. But he’d respected her decision of course, and had made his way to Lux, the memory of her lips on his cheek tattooed onto his skin. There, he had settled by the piano with some whisky and his thoughts. Suffice it to say, he wasn’t much interested in entertaining anyone tonight. Not that he ever was anymore, really. Something inside him had changed and all those fun, meaningless things that had once brought him pleasure were simply not what he sought anymore.

 

(They weren’t Chloe, a small voice inside of him whispered).

 

But when he raised his head intent on telling the other person just what exactly he thought of them barging in like that, he came face to face with the object of his current thought process.

 

Much like the first time she had come to his place late at night, her hair was dishevelled, framing her face in wild waves. She was wearing an oversized sweater that looked like it might have been Detective Douche’s and he couldn’t help the small pang of jealousy that shot through him at the thought before he quickly managed to wash it down with a sip of whiskey. Daniel and her were in the past, they shared a bond through their daughter that would never be severed and they were friends, but that was all there was to it. There was no reason for him to get jealous.

 

It wasn’t until she lifted her head that he could see she had been crying, her face puffy and swollen and blue eyes swimming with still unshed tears.

 

The surge of concern and anger that rose up inside him was almost dizzying and he rushed over to where she was still standing, barely outside of the elevator.

 

“What happened?”, he almost _demanded_ , hands coming up to frame her face out of their own volition. “Who did this?”

 

She didn’t reply, but didn’t pull away either, instead she stayed still like a statue, eyes staring blindly ahead as if they couldn’t see.

 

“Chloe?”, he asked, concern replacing the anger that had seeped into his words. Her eyes met his hesitantly.

 

“I need a place to stay”, she replied shakily after what seemed like an eternity. “Please, just for tonight?”

 

His arms fell away from her face and came to rest on her back instead and he pulled her into him like he had done so many times over the past few months. She followed willingly, curled her body further into him, exhaled slowly and then sucked in a sharp breath that she released on a choked sob. He held her, helplessly, didn’t know what to say or do, his body vibrating with worry and the knowledge that whoever did this would have to pay dearly.

 

“You are always welcome here, Chloe”, he whispered into her hair, felt her ragged breaths against the exposed skin of his sternum.

 

When her sobs quieted down a bit, he lifted her up, growing more concerned when she didn’t protest, and carried her over to the couch. He sat down beside her and she canted into him once more, seeking him out, his arms, the safety they provided. At last, she sat up a bit straighter, but kept her hand wrapped around his arm as she met his eyes slowly.

 

“There was this case”, she started quietly. “It must have been a few months before you showed up. A young college girl, murdered.”

 

She looked down at her lap.

 

“We…I found the killer. It was her best friend. She was jealous so…”, she took a deep breath and he suppressed a hiss when she dug her fingers into the skin of his arm. “So she just killed her. Her best friend of thirteen years.”

 

Shaking her head, she let her gaze wander towards the open doors leading out towards the balcony.

 

“It was so senseless…”, she whispered and he could hear the pain that bled into every word.

 

“She got 25 to life. A month ago, she…” biting her lip, she sucked in another breath. “She killed herself. Her father took it…badly. She had been an only child. He…he called me and threatened me. Threatened Trixie. He said that he would kill her, to show me what it was like to lose a child. He said it was my fault and that she had told him she didn’t do it and he believed her. He was grieving and I’ve experienced many cases like this one,  so I didn’t give it much thought. Until today.”

 

She met his eyes again and he could see fresh tears glimmering inside them. His heart contracted and for a second he felt like he couldn’t breathe.

 

“Is Beatrice – “

 

“She’s fine”, Chloe replied before he could finish the thought and he could feel hot relief wash through him.

 

“There was another girl with dark hair and dark eyes, he must have confused them.”

 

Exhaling slowly, she let her head fall back onto the couch cushion, gaze pointed towards the ceiling, eyes staring ahead without seeing anything.

 

“But it could have been Trixie. He wanted it to be Trixie and…”

 

Her free hand curled into a fist by her side, she closed it more tightly until the knuckles turned white.

 

“He said it was my fault. Blamed me. Told me I would have to live with another family losing their daughter and I…”

 

Her voice broke on the last word as small, choked sobs escaped her throat. Sucking in a deep breath, Lucifer wrapped his arms more tightly around her and she let herself fall into him, her tears seeping through the fabric of his shirt as she cried and cried. He held her to him as his eyes, his soul, glowed red with anger. At the people who had committed these atrocities, who had hurt innocent people and had hurt _her_. At her agony that he couldn’t ease. At his father, too, because this was maybe, probably part of his plan. And she didn’t deserve it. She was so pure, so _good_ , always going out into the world and trying to make it better, more just, even as she carried the weight of her own world around with her. She didn’t deserve to feel like she had any part in the suffering of this innocent child, because she did _not_. And he didn’t even want to know what would have happened had it been Beatrice Decker tonight. All he knew was that he wouldn’t have been able to assemble the pieces. Even now he could only try, could only lend a helping hand and a shoulder to lean on.

 

And he wanted to punish the man. He want to put him through the hell he was putting Chloe through right now and more, but deep inside himself he knew that this would not relieve her of the pain she felt. All he could hope for was time and the light of morning. Until then he could only wrap himself around her and press soft kisses to her forehead. Could only whisper in her ear the only truth he knew, that this was in no way her fault. Could only hold her until her sobs finally quieted down and were replaced by the eerie silence of the night, interrupted only by the subdued sounds of her ragged breathing.

 

And when she finally fell asleep, he carefully lifted her up and carried her over to his bedroom. He gently deposited her on the bed and took off her shoes, wrapping the silk sheets around her and watching as she curled into them immediately. Her face looked restless even in the pale light of the moon and he felt another pang of sorrow shoot through him and knew there was nothing else he could do. He stayed like this for a little while, watching the quick rise and fall of her chest that spoke of fitful sleep. Finally he got up and he was halfway towards the door when he heard her voice, barely above a whisper but clear as the night sky.

 

“Stay”, she breathed. “Please.”

 

He turned around on his feet, afraid that he had only imagined it and let her gaze meet his. When she didn’t waver, he walked slowly towards the bed where he shed his shoes and jacket and trousers. She curled him as soon as he lay down on the bed, tangling her hand in the fabric of his shirt. He exhaled softly and pulled her close. Pressed a soft kiss to her eyelids and the tip of her nose and felt her breath stutter softly at the gesture.

 

Beneath his skin, his heart was beating wildly, its rhythm was a language neither of them spoke just yet. Soon they would understand.

 

Until then he would stay right here.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For BurningUpASunJustToSayHello who asked for “Hey, hey, calm down. They can’t hurt you anymore” and "I haven't slept in ages" from [this](https://moonatoms.tumblr.com/post/166015476964/drabble-challenge) prompt meme.

He’d watched her sleep for a while now, cradling her close to him and whispering soft words into her ear every time she grew restless, when her breathing changed suddenly and quiet whimpers started escaping her, echoing discordantly through the empty room.

 

“No”, she moaned, still trapped in sleep and whichever nightmarish gates her mind was erecting around her. “Please don’t hurt us. Please don’t hurt her.”

 

An agonized cry escaped her lips all of the sudden and his heart broke at the guess of which turn her dream had taken.

 

Pulling her closer, he pressed his lips to her sweaty forehead, held her tightly but she only grew more agitated at that, kicking and whimpering as she tried to push him away.

 

“It’s me, Chloe”, he called to her softly, didn’t know how else to assuage her. “It’s me. Wake up.”

 

Not knowing whether he should hold her close or let her go, he settled on putting a bit of space between them though his hand remained on her back, tracing soothing patterns there.

 

“Hey”, he tried again. “Chloe. Hey, calm down. He can’t hurt you anymore. You’re safe. Beatrice is safe, too. Please, wake up.”

 

She stirred at last, watery blue eyes meeting his darker ones and before he could say anything, she had curled into him again and buried her head in the crease of his neck.

 

“I’m sorry”, she whispered and his hands stilled their movement.

 

Brows furrowing in confusion, he let his hands come up to tangle in her hair, his lips meeting the top of her head once again.

 

“You have nothing to apologize for, love”, he stated quietly but assuredly. “And you are safe here, I promise you. Just like I promise that this bastard will be punished accordingly.”

 

She pulled back at that and her gaze met his.

 

“Promise me you won’t do anything stupid, Lucifer”, she said seriously and when he tried to protest, she held up her hand.

 

“No, please, you have to promise me this.” Taking a deep breath, she let her eyes fall down onto the tangled sheets beside them. “I need you. As my partner and as a friend and as…”

 

She trailed off, eyes still cast downward, afraid she had said too much. But he didn’t pull away, lifted her chin up slowly instead until their eyes met at last. Hoped she could see, hoped she could understand, all the things he didn’t know how to articulate just yet. Just like he saw it reflected in her gaze, too. And maybe, in the midst of this, in the middle of this night, they were finally on one page.

 

Ever so softly, he leaned forward and she did, too. Illuminated only by the light of the moon, their lips met halfway, in a shy, soft kiss. It didn’t last long, it didn’t have to. There would be time for more later, when they were both a little less raw and scraped open than tonight, but for now it was enough to convey everything they wanted to say.

 

When they broke apart again, there was a small smile on her face. It was mirrored on his, too, when he softly guided them into a lying position again. For a few minutes, all they did was look at each other, their fingers tangled together between them while their breathing evened out.

 

“I’m sorry for waking you up though”, Chloe said at last. “But I’m glad I’m here…you’re here. You make me feel so safe.”

 

He felt something flutter in his chest at her words, a warmth that came from somewhere deep within him, and realized the same was true for him, too. She made him feel safe, safer even than he had felt in the midst of all the celestial being. And more than that, she made him feel accepted. Not as broken as he always thought he was.

 

Closing the gap between them for a second time, he pressed another soft kiss to her lips before pulling back again.

 

“There is no need to be sorry, love”, he said quietly. “I’m glad I was here even though I felt completely and utterly helpless and not being able to do a bloody thing – “

 

“You did enough”, she interrupted him gently. “You were there. And I could hear your voice. It broke through the nightmare and pulled me out of it. So thank you.”

 

Releasing the hand she was still holding onto, she let it trail up to his shoulder instead and used the leverage to pull him closer.

 

“We should try to sleep again”, she breathed against his sternum once they had settled down again with their limbs tangled. When he didn’t reply she lifted her head to find him staring down at her, a peculiar expression on his face.

 

“What?”, she asked.

 

He sighed and bit his lip, his eyes falling down to where his hands were slowly moving up and down her arm.

 

“I…”, he started. “I…ahhh…don’t really sleep. I haven’t slept in ages, actually.”

 

“What?”, she repeated incredulously. “Lucifer, everyone sleeps. Humans need sleep…”

 

Sitting up suddenly, she glanced down at him.

 

“Is this another part of your ‘I’m the devil’ spiel?”

 

He sat up, too, at that, and gave her a sad smile.

 

“It’s not a spiel, Chloe”, he said earnestly. “I really am the devil. And I wish you would just believe me.”

 

Leaning forward, a pensive expression fell over Chloe’s face. Nodding slowly, she bit her lip before letting her eyes meet his again.

 

“If you really are the devil”, she sighed. “Then you must have a way to prove it.”

 

Closing his eyes at her request, he took a deep breath before opening them again.

 

“I can’t”, he whispered sadly.

 

Using her hands to frame his face, she pulled herself up until their eyes met and their noses were almost touching.

 

“Why not?” she asked him, unable to understand his struggle. “Why –“

 

“Because you will leave and I can’t bear the thought of it.” He interrupted her exasperatedly. “I’m the devil, Chloe. I’m…”

 

“You’re not evil”, she argued, reading his thought before he could finish it. “Even if you are the devil, it doesn’t make you evil.”

 

She shook her head softly, a small smile dancing at the corner of her lips.

 

“You infuriate me”, she said with a curl of her lips. “You can be inappropriate. And completely annoying. Sometimes I feel like I have two children instead of one.”

 

She took a deep breath, tears now glistening at the corner of her eyes.

 

“But you are also incredibly loyal. Brave. You always have my back. You care so much even if you pretend you don’t. I know I can trust you, and I hope you trust me, too, because this…”

 

Biting her lip, she looked briefly at the ceiling before meeting his gaze again.

 

“I really want this. Us. I just…I know I can be me with you. And I know you will never hurt me. So no, you are not evil, Lucifer. And nothing will ever make me believe you are.”

 

Nodding his head, he grasped her hands in his and squeezed softly.

 

“I do trust you”, he said after a few beats. “And I will show you…just promise me you’ll try to stay?”

 

And then, before she could even do so much as nod, he changed right in front of her eyes, angry dark red skin replacing smooth one and eyes glowing with fire. She gasped briefly but never let go, her eyes remaining fixed on him. He looked so small even as the devil and her heart shattered in her chest at the look on his face. It spoke of pain and longing and of fear. The fear that she would run, like so many other people had in the face of what they perceived as pure evil, even if it was the furthest thing from it. So she did the only thing she could do. She leaned forward and kissed him, kissed him with everything she had, hoping to convey what she felt, hoping to convey that this did not change anything. It didn’t.

 

Yes, he was the devil. But she hadn’t been lying before. She did not think he was evil. If anything, he was just as lost and broken as everyone else. History had it all wrong and he was paying the price. But they were here now and she wouldn’t let him go.

 

Underneath her own, she could feel his skin change, and when they finally pulled back, the eyes that were staring back at her were dark brown instead of fiery red. He was looking almost stunned, his eyes brimming with emotions as his hand moved over her skin, touching, holding, like he couldn’t believe it. Like he was drowning and she was saving him from the waves.

 

“This doesn’t change anything”, she said, breathed the words into his skin. He shuddered and pressed her close.

 

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier”, he whispered.

 

She smiled, soft and open.

 

“I can’t say that I didn’t wish you had, but I think I understand.”

 

Tangling her hand in the hair at the nape of his neck, she pressed her lips to his cheek and leaned her head against his.

 

“There is so much more I have to tell you”, he admitted quietly, but she shushed him gently.

 

“And there will be time for that, tomorrow. For now, we need to…well I need to sleep and you…”

 

He had to laugh at that, let his arms engulf her fully, knowing his next words were nothing but the truth.

 

“I will rest. I rest better when I am with you.”

 

He felt her answering smile against his face.

 

They fell silent again and soon her breathing evened out as she fell into sleep. He held her all throughout the night and every time she grew restless, he’d pull her closer until she quieted again with a sigh.

 

And when morning finally came and she opened her eyes to the dancing rays of the sun, she found him already looking at her, a smile stretching widely across his face.

 

They didn’t know what the day would bring, or tomorrow. But for now they were here and for now it was enough.

**Author's Note:**

> Title and lyrics from Asgeír's "Going Home".


End file.
